My Very First Fathers Day!

I never liked fathers day. Not because I didn’t like fathers, but because every celebration of fathers day reminded me of the void in me that I’ve always tried to fill. It reminded me of the relationship i wish I had.

Today is different though. For the very first time I really am celebrating fathers day. I’m celebrating my father without any wishful thinking or void in my heart because I have finally accepted the truth that I have always had a dad.

I’ve been going through life listening to the devil’s lies that I have no father looking out for me. I lived all 32 years of my life feeling incomplete and unwanted because my biological dad wasn’t there.

But I know better now. I have been set free from the oppression of that lie by the truth of Gods word. I have always had a father. He formed me and gave me a name and a future. He wrote down everyday of my life in his book. He loves me unconditionally and is always looking out for my good.

A dad who has never left my side for once even when I didn’t realize he was there.  He’s not mad at me and is always in a good mood about me. He sees my imperfections yet, he’s proud of me!

Today is fathers day and for the first time, I have no pain about today. Instead I am full of gratitude to my dad for his amazing grace and patience with me. Bringing me up to this point has been quite a journey I tell you.

Happy fathers day dad, thank you for being not just God, but a great great father.

I Didn’t Know What Love Looked Like…

I didn’t know what a good man is supposed to look like or treat me because I didn’t have a dad to show me who a good man is.

I grew up hearing stories about how my dad got my mum pregnant and left. So my earliest impressions of men were that they were not to be trusted. They’ll always leave. The more I heard tales about my rejection, heard tales of how my mother struggled to raise me alone as a single broke mom, heard how my grandmother had to take me from her to save us from starving, the more inferior and unloved I felt.

I believed something was wrong with me and I have to work at making people love me. I believed I had to be the kind of person I imagined they would love. The more men I met, the more identities and personas I adopted. In the process, I lost me.

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Self-Love Is Not Skin Deep…

There’s a lot that is being said about self-love these days it’s almost becoming ‘trendy’ or ‘woke’ to talk about self-love. but what really is self-love?

It sounds like it’s self-explanatory enough when you look at it at face value. We read articles telling us all about loving ourselves, loving our bodies, pampering ourselves, taking trips alone, shopping, going to the spa, and generally giving ourselves a treat.

These are all nice things to do but that’s not all self-love is all about. Self-Love is deeper than that. self-love is about knowing yourself well enough to accept who you really are with no ambiguities and masking and falling in love with who you really are.

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How are you doing today?

I feel so strongly that i should encourage you this morning, that whatever you might be going through this moment, this season, DO NOT FEAR. YOU WILL COME OUT FINE!

In whatever situation you find yourself, DO NOT LOSE YOURSELF. Always be conscious of who you are and whose you are.

You are the beloved of God

You are the apple of God’s eyes

You  matter to God

You are Important

You are beautiful

You are Lovable

You have been blessed and gifted

You deserve love and every good thing

God does not make mistakes. You are NOT a mistake. Your life is not a mistake; God knows what he is doing and he is working to make everything work together for your good.

This morning, please trust God to come through for you. I have seen and experienced him come through for me in the most amazing ways and If he did it before, he can and he will do it again. He is the same God yesterday, today and tomorrow.

Smile, Laugh, Dance and be encouraged!

I Love you

We Need Kisses & We Need Hugs….

Relationships are important. God intends for us to have them; with him as well as with each other; that’s why he made us relational beings.  We all crave relationship in one form or the other. family relationships, friendships, companionships, and at the core of our being is the ultimate craving for a relationship with God. It might take a while for some people to get there, but eventually, they will realize that empty space can only be filled with relationship with God.

Our relationship with other people is driven by 3 core drivers; and these drivers determine if we maintain a healthy relationship or if we mess it up. They are: ATTENTION, AFFECTION & AFFIRMATION.

Continue reading “We Need Kisses & We Need Hugs….”

Yes, You Can & You Should Pray For Bae!

This is not really meant to be a ‘relationship or marriage coach’ kinda post. (Apologies in advance if it reads like that).
I just really want to share about how important prayer is in our relationship with our partners. Whether married, engaged or dating, if you’re in love and romantically involved with someone, you cannot take prayer out of the relationship.

Let me start by saying that if you do not have the confidence to bear down to talk to God about the person you’re with, you might want to check the foundations of that relationship and be honest with yourself if you should be with that person.

See, God loves love. Yes he does! He’s the author of love. In fact he is LOVE himself! So God loves the fact that you are in love with someone and he’s willing to help you navigate the ups and downs of unconditionally loving another imperfect human like yourself.

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3 Reasons Why You Keep Falling For The ‘Wrong’ Guys

If you keep falling for the wrong guys and hooking up with men you’re not supposed to touch with a ten mile pole, it’s probably because you haven’t figured out that you just might be the problem.

  1. You haven’t gotten to know yourself. – If you have not taken out time to meet you, understand you, accept what makes you tick, what drives you, what pisses you off, what you love, who you are and what your values are, you’ll fall into the shadow of anyone around you and before you know it, you’ll adapt to any guy you’re currently dating. You’ll lose your individuality because you never knew enough about yourself to assert yourself in the relationship.

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Love Is Dead

Love is dead and no one Is mourning. No one mourns because no one knows

They see the flowers, we see the smiles, the soft whisper of sweet words and feel the sensual embrace of the lover.

Gold, silver, pearls and rubies. All beautiful and shiny. Bright lights and starry eyes. Perfect smiles and perfect photos.

They have been carried away by the lure of Eros.

Love is dead and no one mourns. No one mourns because no one knows

No one knows because the impostor is here. He says:

Take it. Don’t give it

Say it. You don’t have to mean it

If you want it, go get it

Have sex with it. You don’t need to marry it.

Love is dead and no one mourns. No one mourns because no one knows

No one knows because no one sees. Blinded by the Impostor’s lies, they do not see. Covered in fear and shame, they didn’t look up.

If they did, they would have seen him. Pierced side, punctured palms and feet, evidence of his suffering. Evidence of true love.

Arms open, heart open wide. Eyes pleading. Waiting. Look he says. I am he. I am true love. And I live.

But will they believe?

There’s No Such Thing As a Soul Mate!

The philosophy of a “soul mate” has done far more harm than good in our society. First and foremost, it’s a concept that is rooted in ancient mythology. Story has it that the gods split human beings as a form of punishment for their pride.

Since then, human beings have been on the search to find their “soul mate” in an attempt to reach completion once again. Ancient mythology declares that there is this unspoken knowledge—some sort of feeling a person experiences when they come face to face with their soul mate. It’s the idea that we’re half-full people waiting around for someone else to complete us.

I don’t know about you, but that doesn’t sound very healthy to me.

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PODCAST: About Love & Celebrity Relationships With Adekunle Gold

This week’s episode of THE FAVORED WOMAN SHOW features Nigerian singer/songwriter; Adekunle Gold, who is quite famous for his soulful love songs and softly romantic lyrics. Adekunle Gold’s new song talked about his searching for Love, so i sat with him to discuss his views on celebrity relationships and what his ideal woman would be like.

Oh yes! True to his romantic form, he brought me a whole box of delicious cupcakes! 🙂

Enjoy the show

About My Crush & Imaginary Date…

Let me start by saying that there are no “deep spiritual lessons” that I want to share in this post. I just wanted to tell you about something that happened to me.

Anyway, last year I saw a man and admired him from a distance. I observed the ease at which he went about his business, his obvious skill set and the intelligence that couldn’t help but show as he did what he did.

All these I noticed and liked. But I had no conversation with him despite the fact that I was quite attracted. He had this “air” around him that was enigmatic and that piqued my interest.

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The Only Way To Understand Your Value

Do you ever think about how valuable you are?  Maybe you already know that. Maybe you have parents or siblings or friends or even a spouse who lets you know that on a daily basis.  Or maybe you don’t.

Whether or not someone tells you is not the case here though. It’s whether or not you know for sure that you’re precious and valuable.

Get this. You’re not valuable because someone says you are, you’re not valuable because of the amazing things you do at work or the selfless sacrifices you make for your loved ones. It’s not about your contributions to society either.

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Give Love… Get Loved In Return….

It’s amazing how we can preach a biblical principle and hardly experience it ourselves. And when we finally do, our minds are blown away to epic proportions.

So for a while i have been learning about loving on other people and living outside of myself. It’s not an easy lesson i tell you. especially for someone whose life has always revolved around what works for her. But somehow, God kept me on track and drags me back on course when i stray.

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PODCAST: You Are Not The Holy Spirit!

I Have not recorded in a while because I needed time to listen, learn and grow. These past few months have been an incredible journey. I have learnt and i’m still learning about myself and my attitude to life, love and my relationships.

This short message is one of such lessons and i am grateful to God for letting me share it with you. Too many times, we are concerned about being right and proving our point, but more often than not, we hurt people and wound our brothers and sisters that God has commissioned us to take care of.

Listen, be blessed and don’t forget to download & share.

False Worship…

Why do we withhold grace and mercy from those who need them because we think they don’t deserve it?

My gateman Suleiman has shown me several times in different ways that he needs some provisions for his Ramadan fast. I have ignored because he’s been behaving badly of late.

And then this morning, God led me here:

Continue reading “False Worship…”