The feeling of loss is not a good feeling; loss of a job, a loved one or a prized possession. Sometimes we mourn that which we have lost with so much energy and passion; especially after we seemed to have done all that is in our power to do to prevent it from happening.
From intense pain to grief to numbness, and sometimes even resentment, we feel it all. But we don’t heal as long as we continue to focus on what has been lost.
There is a time and season for everything. Recognise when it’s time to move to a new season; A season of healing and rest. This can only happen when you re-fix your focus. Know when it’s time to turn to what God is doing in you at the moment, what he is working out inside you, what lessons you are learning and what blessings are currently in your life.
If you keep looking back at the people you lost, you will not appreciate the people you have. If you keep looking back at the things you no longer have, you will not be grateful for what you have right now.
Gratitude helps you heal. Gratitude opens your inner eyes to possibilities and opens your heart to receiving God’s grace.
Fix your focus on what God is currently working out in you right now. You don’t have to understand what is happening. You can trust that God is always working out everything for good. (Romans 8:28)
There’s a lot that is being said about self-love these days it’s almost becoming ‘trendy’ or ‘woke’ to talk about self-love. but what really is self-love?
It sounds like it’s self-explanatory enough when you look at it at face value. We read articles telling us all about loving ourselves, loving our bodies, pampering ourselves, taking trips alone, shopping, going to the spa, and generally giving ourselves a treat.
These are all nice things to do but that’s not all self-love is all about. Self-Love is deeper than that. self-love is about knowing yourself well enough to accept who you really are with no ambiguities and masking and falling in love with who you really are.
Continue reading “Self-Love Is Not Skin Deep…”
How are you doing today?
I feel so strongly that i should encourage you this morning, that whatever you might be going through this moment, this season, DO NOT FEAR. YOU WILL COME OUT FINE!
In whatever situation you find yourself, DO NOT LOSE YOURSELF. Always be conscious of who you are and whose you are.
You are the beloved of God
You are the apple of God’s eyes
You matter to God
You are Important
You are beautiful
You are Lovable
You have been blessed and gifted
You deserve love and every good thing
God does not make mistakes. You are NOT a mistake. Your life is not a mistake; God knows what he is doing and he is working to make everything work together for your good.
This morning, please trust God to come through for you. I have seen and experienced him come through for me in the most amazing ways and If he did it before, he can and he will do it again. He is the same God yesterday, today and tomorrow.
Smile, Laugh, Dance and be encouraged!
I Love you
Social Media is the place to stumble on good news. Good news that doesn’t seem to have anything to do with you. Or worse, good news that make you sometimes feel like nothing good is happening to you.
Engagement announcements, new baby bump show-offs, graduation ceremonies, exotic holidays, career upgrades or just plain “look-at-me-i’m-so-happy” posts can make you want to ask
“What are these people doing that i’m not doing?”
“Why do they have everything i want?”
“Why do they have it so easy?”
“Why them and not me”?
All these questions and others along the same lines, will eventually lead you to despondency and resentment. Trust me when i tell you this because I’ve been there. It will lead you to bitterness and jealousy too because a person who is not happy with himself/herself cannot be happy for other people.
Continue reading “Why Them? Why Not ME?”
Few days ago, i shared a little bit about growing up insecure and all the baggage that comes with it. I talked about wanting to sit down with you and not just talk about it, but offer help, encouragement, motivation and prayer for anyone who might be going through the same thing.
Our insecurity is from how we emotionally think about ourselves, sometimes rooted in how we were raised, our life experiences and some of the words spoken over us as we grew up. Some of us have had our self-esteem battered over the years and we don’t even know how much this is affecting our everyday life
Insecurity and low self-esteem has pushed so many young women into the wrong relationships and in some cases, abusive relationships.
Please register to sit and talk with me and my sisters on Saturday 10th June at Bukka Hut, 61 Admiralty way, Lekki Phase One, Lagos.
Admission is Free! But please register —> HERE
Once upon a time, I didn’t like myself very much. I didn’t like how I looked, I didn’t think I was particularly bright (most likely because I grew up being told I was stupid) I was a sensitive and an emotional child and the many negative comments thrown at me affected me deeply.
Growing up in a single parent household, I was a rebellious teenager with identity crisis and self-worth issues. At a young age, I became a people pleaser who will go to great lengths for other people just to be liked and be accepted. Let’s just say that emotionally, I was a wreck and while this followed me into adulthood, I skillfully covered it up with church and religious activities and professional excellence.
Continue reading “INTRODUCING: ‘IdentiFIGHT’ – The Fight For The Real You!”
Everyone has a past. Some more sordid than others. No matter how morally squeaky clean you are, you are not without sin.
But what happens when the guilt of our sins overwhelm us so much that it’s a constant deterrent against our happiness and ability to live free? What happens when we are constantly being reminded of what we did and how we lived by people around us and even our own minds?
What do we do when we can’t enjoy anything because we are constantly trying to make up and apologize for who we used to be? What happens when we feel we have no right to good things now because of the not so good things we did before?
Continue reading “Close The Door And Move On…”
There are certain kinds of people in your life you should not let go of. They might not be there yet, but pay attention; because when they do show up, they might not show up in the package you expect but if you are sensitive to your spirit, you will recognize them.
I celebrate one of such people today. someone with a soul so beautiful and pure and sweet…
I thought i was all grown and set in my ways when we met. But like the bible says “iron sharpens iron…”, friendship with him opened up all the areas i needed to work on and sharpen in my life. As we rub off against each other (a lot of time in a battle of strong wills), I learn, i grow and i see myself becoming the woman i should be.
I celebrate him because he loves me and he lets me know it. I celebrate him because he has a heart for God and he genuinely cares about people.
I celebrate him because he’s focused, driven, super hard working and extremely creative. His entire life is an inspiration to not just me, but everyone who know him.
A dependable friend, amazing lover, a brother from another mother, my super supporter and business adviser. Yeah he’s all of that and more. Do i have to tell you how much i’m in love with him? I guess you already know by now.
Anyway, it’s his birthday today and i’m super grateful to God for making this amazing man witness another great year.
Happy Birthday SugarBae
No it’s not my birthday yet and Lord knows i don’t particularly feel like it is right now but what i do know is that, it’s a great season of my life right now.
God has been right here with me, walking me through the roller coaster of growing, making mistakes, learning how to love and how to be the truly favored woman he named me. I have been far from perfect. I have hurt people and i have been hurt by people, but through it all, i am learning to live my life deliberately.
So that’s what this shoot is really about. Living life with intention.
Clothes Designed and Styled by CheChe Smith for CSN NATION
Make-Up by Makeup Explorer
Photography by SunnyDays Media
Continue reading “NEW PHOTOS: About Living Life Deliberately…”
“If you tell anyone about this, I will stop paying your school fees.”
My name is Becky, I’m 20 years old and I live in this real world.
I was born in Shira, Bauchi State. I currently live just north of Lagos, in Ogun State. I stay with my uncle because he can afford my fees, my father cannot. I do not remember what it feels like to be loved and protected – my mother is dead.
In this choice between getting an education and avoiding daily rape, at first I chose school. This started when I was 18, now, it is no longer a choice. It has been 2 years of constant rape and abuse. If I stay here I will die. And if I leave, I will die as well, only, a different death.
“If you tell anyone about this, I will stop paying your school fees”, he says. Continue reading “Please Help Becky Escape From Her Rapist!”
There was a time being called a ‘role model’ was a compliment. For a lot of people, I guess it still is. It is usually translated to mean you’re doing something exemplary, something worth emulating or you are someone exemplary, someone worth emulating. which can be a pretty good confidence booster. all of those fan emails, social media followers and adoring looks and requests for mentoring can’t be all bad right? well… it can be.
Because over the years, the more my life became a little more public, courtesy of my job and activities on social media, the more i got tagged with the ‘role model’ label and I must confess, the less I liked it.
Continue reading “Trust Me, I’m NOT Your Role Model”
Mary is called “The Magdalene” because she was from Magdala, a thriving fishing town on the coast of Galilee. While there were other towns with similar names, Magdala is within walking distance of Capernaum, where Jesus was based at the start of his ministry. Recent archaeological findings in the current day Israeli town of Migdal, including a 1st century synagogue, support this explanation.
There are half-dozen Marys mentioned in the Bible. but the most distinguishing characteristic about this particular Mary is that Jesus cast seven demons out of her (Luke 8:2-3).
Continue reading “She Was NOT A Prostitute…”
Often times you hear that you don’t apply mental reasoning in spiritual matters. You just accept them the way they are and don’t try to overanalyze it. This is true, and I believe this…to an extent.
In as much as I believe human reasoning can’t fully comprehend spiritual matters, I also believe that God didn’t give us our minds without a purpose. You really can’t separate the mind from spiritual matters. But often, people discard reasoning entirely to embrace a spiritual knowledge with little or no understanding of it.
Our minds have been given to us for evaluation. Our minds naturally analyze things, including spiritual matters…Yes, I said it. If it’s not so, then why does God see the need for us to renew our minds?
Continue reading “GUEST POST: Spirituality & Mental Reasoning – By Onyedika Nwoji”
I have always wanted to talk about the age of independence of the Nigerian child. At what point do parents realize that they have raised an adult who is able to make his her own decisions and choices in life?
Most people believe that when a child moves out of the home, starts earning, and probably sending his/her parents some kind of allowance, then he or she is truly independent. But within the Nigerian context, this is hardly so. Young people are barely ever seen as independent by parents even when they start earning or living on their own.
Continue reading “About Independence From Nigerian Parenting…”
Relationships are important. God intends for us to have them; with him as well as with each other; that’s why he made us relational beings. We all crave relationship in one form or the other. family relationships, friendships, companionships, and at the core of our being is the ultimate craving for a relationship with God. It might take a while for some people to get there, but eventually, they will realize that empty space can only be filled with relationship with God.
Our relationship with other people is driven by 3 core drivers; and these drivers determine if we maintain a healthy relationship or if we mess it up. They are: ATTENTION, AFFECTION & AFFIRMATION.
Continue reading “We Need Kisses & We Need Hugs….”